Teach for America Institute

"We habitually and instinctively look to other things besides God and his grace as our justification, hope, significance and security. We believe the gospel at one level, but at deeper levels we do not. Human approval, professional success, power and influence, family and clan identity- all of these things serve as our heart’s “functional trust” rather than what Christ has done, and as a result we continue to be driven to a great degree by fear, anger, and lack of self-control. You cannot change such things through mere will-power, through learning Biblical principles and trying to carry them out. We can only change permanently as we take the gospel more deeply into our understanding and into our hearts. We must feed on the gospel, as it were, digesting it and making it part of ourselves. That is how we grow." -Tim Keller

A quick update:

Life has been crazy, its amazing how quickly 3 weeks has flown by. The days are long, but the weeks go by quick. I am currently in Atlanta, GA living in the dorms of Georgia Tech with about 750 other TFA corps members. The South Carolina (there are only 86 of us), New Orleans (250+), Atlanta (250+), Ohio (35 members) and a few smaller regions are all together at institute to train. We all wake up around 5:15am then have breakfast at 6:00am and we are all on school buses by 6:30am to be transported to our assigned inner city schools. I was placed at Brown Middle School in the neighborhood where Martin Luther King grew up. My kids will go from this middle school to Booker T. Washington HS, where MLK graduated from. I am currently teaching an 8th grade English class from 9:00-9:55am with about 12 kids...all African American and carrying lots of baggage from home. Theres a story behind every one of their little faces.

The time I am not teaching, we are rigorously working in classrooms in workshops and lecture sessions. Its an extremely overwhelming amount of information to absorb and my brain often feels like mush. But, I am still alive and thanks to Camp Ozark, I know my limits and how to take care of myself. I refuse to sacrifice sleep, exercise and nutrition so I am one of the few who still has my head held high. People are quickly realizing how things start tumbling down the second you stop taking care of yourself. Its about that time when people are starting to quit and give up, there have been lots of tears and break downs around this place. Good thing, I love to encourage people! haha. 

I am having a hard time learning how to lesson plan, but I know it will come. I just have to keep trying and learning from failures. I'll admit, its not easy at all. I love my kids and I know they know I care, but its hard to make learning "fun" for them. I feel like, they are so desensitized to failure that they really dont care about grades and they are just not motivated in school. Last week I taught them about MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech and we had to find the methods he uses to advance his argument (allusions, repetition and metaphors). Something that is so easy for you and I is like a foreign language to them. Most of them, cannot even write complete sentences. They cant spell and they have a hard time reading. It brings tears to my eyes to think about how privileged I have been...why was I born in such a wonderful home? I could have been born into this situation just like them. 

I may never have such an incredible opportunity to be exposed to such diversity again. Just within TFA I walk down the hallway and there are 10 different accents from all around the country, there are Buddists, Muslims, Jewish, Atheistic people and then I go to these schools and the culture is like nothing I have ever known....this is an amazing experience. It is bringing out my strengths, but more importantly forcing me to see my weaknesses and face them. 

I could go on and on, but I have to get back to lesson planning! All that to say, I am in an incredible place of growth and I could not do it without your support! I love you all so much and I am so beyond thankful for the people in my life!! 

Thank you for your prayers and encouragement, you have no idea how refreshing it is just knowing you all are behind me.

Miss Pitts :)

"Everyone to whom much was given, of him much will be required, and from him to whom they entrusted much, they will demand the more." Luke 12:48

The Mountaintop

The days have been long and every day I crawl into bed only to fall into deep sleep, but there is a peace flooding over me. Since I arrived about a week ago, my Teach for America training has been a whirlwind. Tonight is the first night I have sat down to even try to process anything. I still do not know my placement, where I will move when we get back on July 23, who I will live with, what school I will teach at, what class I will specifically teach, and on top of all this I found out last week I have to re-take this treacherous standardized test on Saturday at 6:30am. Its really beyond me how or why I have not been overcome by anxiety since I have had every opportunity to succumb to it. At this point, I am so thankful to be here because I know this is exactly where I am meant to be. Every day I feel myself climbing this steep hill, but I refuse to take my eyes off the mountain top. I can see the light from above and all I can think about is how I just want to do God's will. I know I will stumble and I know I will fall, but more than that I know He will help me up.

"Well, I don't know what will happen now. We've got some difficult days ahead. But it really doesn't matter with me now, because I've been to the mountaintop."

-MLK Jr. 

Beginning on Monday, I get the chance to teach my own class of 8th grade English and we are ironically analyzing one of Martin Luther King Jr.'s speeches. He grew up near this middle school and went to the high school my students will go to next year. After reading his speech, the passage above stood out to me. Dr. King had wisdom and he knew something about a hope many have yet to discover. 

"Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer."

Romans 12:12

Thank you for your prayers, they are powerful and effective. It is only the beginning of a long two years and I cannot wait to share my experiences with you! I will try to continue writing, but be patient with me.  

Freely Give

The time has finally arrived, I leave Monday for a long summer of TFA training in Atlanta, GA. As I prepare, I have been reading and re-reading my favorite story about Jesus walking on water in Matthew 14. It always inspires me to get out of the boat and experience defying gravity and the laws of nature with Jesus Christ. Even when we sink (which we always will, over and over again), all we have to do is cry out for Him to help us and scripture says, "Jesus immediately reached out his hand and took hold of him..." We have to persevere even in the face of trial and difficulty; it is in the midst of the wind and the waves we are lifted up NOT by ourselves, but by Jesus' strength alone. Faith believes when everything around you tries to dissuade you, faith makes possible the impossible.

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33 

There is a story preceding Jesus walking on water, about Jesus feeding five thousand with a few loaves and fishes. 

But Jesus said, “They need not go away; you give them something to eat.” They said to him, “We have only five loaves here and two fish.” And he said, “Bring them here to me.” Matthew 14:16-18

Initially Jesus gives us gifs and the things we have, but until we surrender and lay them at his feet, He cannot use them to feed the thousands. What loaves and fishes have I yet to bring to Him? He freely gives me my life, but not just for myself. It is easy for us to get caught up in ourselves and believing what we have is for the benefit of ourselves, but how much could we give of our lives if we let go of the burden and allow Jesus to perform the miracle. He does not ask us to solve the world's hunger, he just asks the disciples to bring Him something to work with. The gift is not our gifts themselves, but in the experience of handing them over to Jesus and trusting Him to use them for His glory, not our own. 


What does that look like for us right now?


Personally, it is recognizing how pride has deceivingly caused me to believe I have little or nothing to give. I can relate to the disciples when they approach Jesus with a measly five loaves and two fish...they must be thinking "Wow, this is nothing and definitely not enough to feed five thousand people! There is no way we can even attempt to feed all these people."


How immature and prideful of us to limit God and believe He cannot do the impossible. Once again, our lack of belief in God's power inhibits not only us, but God Himself...how much more could we do for the Kingdom if we truly believed in God's power to work through measly humans like us? We cannot pretend to know how God uses us, but we can surrender our lives in complete faith knowing he does use us. We have been equipped with many gifts and have no right to deserve any praise for anything, but Jesus has every right to use us, we are His. Serve the least of your brothers when they are hungry, thirsty or need something to wear. The hardest part for me is trying to feed those who do not recognize their own hunger, but then recognizing I fall into that category also.

"Home Again" by Michael Kiwanuka

Home again, Home again
One day I know
I'll feel home again
Born again, Born again


One day I know

I'll feel strong again

I left my head

Many times I've been told

All this talk will make you old

So I close my eyes

Look behind

Moving on, moving on

So I close my eyes

Look behind

Moving on

Lost again, Lost again

One day I know

Our Paths will Cross again

Smile again , Smile again

One day I hope 

To make you smile again

I won't hide

Many times I've been told

Speak your mind, just be bold

So I close my eyes

Look behind

Moving on, moving on

So I close my eyes

And the tears will clear

Then I feel no fear

Then I'd feel no way

My paths will remain straight

Home again, Home again

One day I know

I'll feel home again

Home again, Home again

One day I know

I'll feel strong again

I left my head

Many times I've been told

All this talk will make you old

So I close my eyes

Look behind

Moving on, moving on

So I close my eyes

Look behind

Moving on

HAPPY GRADUATION!

Blue Like Jazz

Tonight I saw the movie, Blue Like Jazz.

My favorite book was turned into a screenplay. Like most books turned into movies, it was nothing like the book for those of you who were wondering...same kind of message, but the plot is totally different. Apparently, Penny and I look alike. Jennie and Penny...thats cute. She's awesome, so I guess I feel good about it.

Word of the day: "authenticity"

Authenticity: undisputed credibility; not false or copied; genuine

Like the book, this movie reminded me of a severely lacking authenticity of faith in our culture. At our private, Baptist University, faith is so easily copied. Its so easy to walk out your door every morning and be the same person you were yesterday. To smile the same smile and say the same things to the same people without them ever knowing how different you feel every day. This sameness kills me. A copy is the same, but not the real deal. Its value is depleted and unoriginal.

"Even our beliefs have become trend statements. We don’t even believe things because we believe them anymore. We only believe things because they are cool things to believe."

 -Donald Miller

Its cool to believe in Jesus here. You hear things like, "Jesus is my homeboy", "Me and Jesus are tight", "I don't need a boy, I'm datin' my man, Jesus"...I'll be the first to admit I have for sure said these very statements in complete sarcasm.

But, when do we ever talk about the hard things? When do we ever talk about the undisputed credibility of what it really looks like to believe and follow Jesus, especially when life gets hard? When do we admit our struggles with lust, greed, pride? Humans are a wretched breed, fallen and broken, every single one of us...we all need saving from ourselves, but we are so scared to show our own struggles and need for something bigger than anything we think we can control.

The college scene in Blue Like Jazz displays a place about as far from the "fake college christian bubble" as you can get...its the most radically different environment where normal is not cookie-cutter christian, normal is everything absurd, everything rebellious, everything anti-cliche christian. But, what most people inside the bubble don't understand is how Jesus dwells there too. Sometimes we have to let ourselves fall into complete disorder and chaos before we find meaning...there is order in chaos.

"And once you live a good story, you get a taste for a kind of meaning in life, and you can't go back to being normal; you can't go back to meaningless scenes stitched together by the forgettable thread of wasted time." 

-Donald Miller

So let me remind us, you and me, to get out of the boat and walk on water...do not be afraid to leave what is comfortable and safe. Do not settle for a life in the safe-zone of no challenges and like-minded people. Challenge yourself, surround yourself with people who are different than you every day. Be bold, be brave and let God show you what life is like when you die to yourself and let Him live in you. Oh and please, oh please, I give you full permission, if I am not out of the boat when you see me next time to throw me overboard and let me experience the wind and the waves...even if I appear afraid, I want nothing more than a life of walking on water with my man, JC. 

"Dying for something is easy because it is associated with glory. Living for something is the hard thing. Living for something extends beyond fashion, glory, or recognition. We live for what we believe.”

-Donald Miller

"To the weak I became weak, that I might win the weak. I have become all things to all people, that by all means I might save some." 

1 Corinthians 9:22

God's plan is not a roadmap

A wonderful friend shared this with me and I want to share this with you...

"God certainly gives us glimmers of clarity, and assurance that we are where He wants us to be—but that doesn’t mean we suddenly become omniscient. Our knowing always remains in part, leaving us weak and dependent. In other words, embracing our finitude and limited understanding is exactly where God wants us to be so that our strength is in Him and not ourselves. But this wanting to know how things will play out lingers in the recesses of my mind. Perhaps it’s because I am easily fixated on what I’m doing rather than on who I am becoming. Without a doubt, when someone asks what God’s will is for their lives they really mean “what does God want me to do with my life?” They assume there is some direct bat-line to the Holy Spirit to answer that question, or there is a trick to knowing God’s will."

Read the rest of this article... http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/deeper-walk/features/28933-gods-plan-isnt-a-roadmap

A Matter of the Heart

There are many things going on in my life from preparing for Teach for America Institue to graduating from college and leaving relationships and a place I have come to call home. I have found myself uneasy and in a place of little control. Time is passing quickly and I cannot, even if I want to, control several things in my life. I want it to slow down. I want it to speed up. I want to know what will happen in the future. I want to know what city in South Carolina I will be. I want to know the children's names and faces and smiles I will encounter in the duration of the next 2 years. I want to know if I can even handle this. I want to know my friends will still be there when I come back.

God has been teaching me a great deal about understanding the matters of our heart. The things we do every day, the emotions we feel, the things we seek and desire, even the littlest trivial things we say...they are ALL reflections of the condition of our hearts. Our day to day lives and what we choose to do with them are a powerful way God speaks to us.

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. Hebrews 13:8

What it all comes down to is, do I really trust Jesus? Do I really believe in His faithfulness? We can live our lives in constant worry and anxiety about what will happen or we can reach out and grab hold of His hand. We can walk blindly knowing not where we are going, but who is leading us.

Look inside yourself and ask yourself why you care so much about where you are going? Who you are dating? Why you are feeling this way or that? What is it you are really seeking?

Perfect relevant example: we seek relationships because we really "like him or her" or "just need a boyfriend/girlfriend"...No, no really you just crave to be cared for, you crave to be loved and to know you are not alone. You want someone there to encourage you and adore you and help you on the good days and bad days. These things are not bad to desire in and of themselves, but seek Him first and these desires will be met. Relationships, whether plutonic friendships or romances, are not a means of securing your value and discovering purpose, they are a reflection of the way He first loved us. They are a reminder of Him. The way we love others should be a natural response to knowing Him and what He has done for you. Relationships are about sacrifice in response to the way Jesus loved and continues to love you.

What are things you crave today? What are your insecurities and what can they teach you about what God is trying to say to you?

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. Matthew 6:33

..and he will be the stability of your times, abundance of salvation, wisdom, and knowledge; the fear of the LORD is Zion’s treasure. Isa. 33:6